Wednesday, March 07, 2007
More adventures from Sudbury:
Today, I went to the grocery store. (Yeah, there really is nothing to do here...:P)
I get in the express line, behind a kindly old gentleman who either a) is physically incapable of shutting up for one damn second, or b) was also on his only adventure of the day, and desperate to talk to people other than his surly home care workers.*
In front of old guy is a younger big guy. Not "big" like he'd have to be removed from his house on a crane, but tall and kind of bulky. He was purchasing, as far as I could tell, a bouquet of red roses mixed with baby's breath.
Old guy, tired of my not-terribly-conversational "mmhmm"s, starts chatting to big guy about the flowers. He never actually says he's referring to the flowers, but starts asking if they're for a girl, and mentioning that they're good for special dates like birthdays, etc. Kind of passing on his lifetime of wisdom to the younger generation, if you will.
Big guy looks increasingly uncomfortable as this goes on, and is also pretty much only throwing out "mmhmm"s. When he finallly got to the cashier, I could see why: the other object he was purchasing - which I hadn't seen until then - was a huge box of condoms.
The poor old guy COMPLETELY shut up (which I guess answers my question from earlier), and everyone stood there in silence as big guy bought his flowers and condoms and then left. At which point old guy turns to me and says, "Well! All I saw was the flowers!" *pause* Then, nods and says in a considering voice, like he's been thinking about it, he says, "I guess they do go together..."
I deserve a freakin' AWARD for keeping a straight face throughout this entire encounter!
*I realise not all home care workers are surly. I just think this guy's are.
Today, I went to the grocery store. (Yeah, there really is nothing to do here...:P)
I get in the express line, behind a kindly old gentleman who either a) is physically incapable of shutting up for one damn second, or b) was also on his only adventure of the day, and desperate to talk to people other than his surly home care workers.*
In front of old guy is a younger big guy. Not "big" like he'd have to be removed from his house on a crane, but tall and kind of bulky. He was purchasing, as far as I could tell, a bouquet of red roses mixed with baby's breath.
Old guy, tired of my not-terribly-conversational "mmhmm"s, starts chatting to big guy about the flowers. He never actually says he's referring to the flowers, but starts asking if they're for a girl, and mentioning that they're good for special dates like birthdays, etc. Kind of passing on his lifetime of wisdom to the younger generation, if you will.
Big guy looks increasingly uncomfortable as this goes on, and is also pretty much only throwing out "mmhmm"s. When he finallly got to the cashier, I could see why: the other object he was purchasing - which I hadn't seen until then - was a huge box of condoms.
The poor old guy COMPLETELY shut up (which I guess answers my question from earlier), and everyone stood there in silence as big guy bought his flowers and condoms and then left. At which point old guy turns to me and says, "Well! All I saw was the flowers!" *pause* Then, nods and says in a considering voice, like he's been thinking about it, he says, "I guess they do go together..."
I deserve a freakin' AWARD for keeping a straight face throughout this entire encounter!
*I realise not all home care workers are surly. I just think this guy's are.
3 Comments:
AWESOME! That is FUNNY.
I would have died laughing.
Instead, I am dying of the plague...
That story made my morning. Hilareous!!
-Tasha
By 
, at
7:34 a.m.
You make me laugh.
By , at
2:59 p.m.
